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Dec. 16th, 2008

PART I: DONUT KINGS

CJ was hungrily eating at Big Smokes brown donut. "Damn CJ! Why did you eat all my doughnuts when i did go to the bathroom here at the donught shop where we are eating donuts~!" "Damn big Smoke! I ate all the donuts because I was hungtry! SHO' NUFF!"
"Damn, sho' nuff CJ! Let's go CJ!"

CJ and Big Smoke get into the car. "LET'S GO TO THE PORN STORE"!!!

Cj and big smoke get intot hte carporno store. CJ is looking at porn and big smoke is eating food. "DAMN C J WHAT IS THIS HITS!!!!" "I need GANGSTA PORNO gansta coz if my porno aint gansta I AINT GANSTA, gansta and that aint gansta!!!!"
            

1 year later...


"DAMN CJ we been driving all day! I need something to eat!" "We'll stop soon. But first we gotta beat some crack addicts with baseball bats." "Damn, CJ! YOU HITTIN' THE BASE... ON THEM THAT'S HITTIN' THE BASE! " "Damn Big Smoke you're like a linguist or someshits!" "Make that a CUNNING LINGUIST! DAMN CJ!" " AAAAH HA HA HA HA HA HA i don't get it"

After killing some drugged out FOO'S and HO'S CJ and Big smoke realise that killing the dealers themselves gave them much more money and in a couple of hours they were millionaires. "DAMN CJ we have enough money to buy whatever we want. I got an idea. Why don't you buy the farm and we start GROWING OUR OWN SWEET STICKY CROP"
"I'd like to smoke your sweet sticky crop big smoke" "DAMN CJ! Wait till we grow it first!" 

PART II: BIG SPENDER

After driving to the farm CJ buys it. "LET'S HAVE A HOUSEWARMING PARTY!"

PART III: THE PARTY

All of CJs friends arrive to the party. They are having a good time when one of the couples goes off alone into a empty room. They start having quite ordinary sex until *CRASH* *BANG* *BRASH* *CANG* A  BIG BRANCH FLIES THROUGH THE WINDOW

CJ and Big sSmoke Come running into the room! "HOLYSHITS WHAT'S  GOING ON IN HERE CJ" " I DON'T KNOW CJ SOEMTHING STRANGE IS HAPPENING."

"Oh forget about it guys it's just a branch let's get stoned and listed to this tape i FOUND IN THE BASEMENT"

Ryder was chopping up really slowly and pissing everyone off. But he didn't go any quicker because he's a stupid loud mouth little FUCK "DAMN RYDER HURRY THE DAMN SHIT UP " "CJ shit up! You're embarrasing homie!" CJ takes ryders head and slams it into the coincrete floor. There is a loud CRACK and ryder shuts his fat mouth forever. "Lets  keep his bones as trophies! Anyway let's go into the other room and listen to that SPOOKY TAPE

They are sitting around smoking a giant inefficient bong. Some guy that's not CJ or Big Smoke starts the tape. "I have been trying to grow the ultimate in hallucinogenic hydroponic weed. RIGHT ON! But damn, nigga, I channeled some SPOOKY RASTAFARIAN EVIL  WEED SPIRIT SHIT when I starting singing Bob Marley backwards... here is a recording..." JUST THEN LIGHTNING CRASHED AND SCARED EVERYONE AND CJS SISTER SCREAMS AND SHUTS OFF THE TAPE!!!!!!! "CJ DAMN IT TURN IT OFF I DON'T WANT TO LISTEN TO IT!!!"
Then sweet said "SHIT CJS SISTER LET'S LISTEN TO IT what wrong wit'choo" so CJ STARTED THE TAPE

"Won pu gnikcip uoy era... Pu gnikcip... Ebiv doog a evah ot tog... Sebiv!"

"THIS IS THE SCARIET SHITS EVER" yells everyone at once! Out side AN OMINOUS FORCE is brewing but t
hey cant see it because it s dark out side and they are inside.

SUDDENLY BIG SMOKE JUMPS UP! "DAMN CJ! I HAVE TO GET SOMETHING TO EAT! IAM CRAZY WITH HUNGER." big smoke is crazy with hungry and he jumps out the window and runs into the forest!!!!!. "DAMN BIG SMOKE YOU CRAZY SHO'NUFF" everyone wonders what big smoke is doing in the forest. They hear him running and crashing into trees and knocking them down.

"DAMN CJ! THERE'S GOTTA BE A QUICKEN CHICKEN AROUND HERE SOMEWHERE" says big smoke. suddenly he trips on a root and falls into the ground. "AWWW HELL NAW" when he is on the ground THE TREES COMES ALIVE AND GRAB HIS FEET WITH BRANCH TENDRILS. The branches curl and twist around his legs and arms! Big smoke is trapped on the graoud!" SHIT I CAINT GET UP!!!!" The branches rip off his clothes and suddenly a BIG BRACH GOES RIGHT INTO HIS ASS "AWWW HELL NAW"

Big smoke is very scared and violated and he goes crazy with hunger and he breaks free and RUNS THROUGH THE DEADLY WOODS PURSUED BY AN UNKNOWN FORCE THAT 

He reaches the farm house and RUNS THROUGH THE DOOR. "BIG SMOKE WHERE ARE YOUR CLOTHES" says big smoke.
CJ says "BIG SMOKE! DID SOMETHING HAPPEN TO YOU IN THE WOODS"

"DAMN CJ HELL NAW... IT... IT WAS THE WOODS THEMSELVES!!!!!"

to be continued...?

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